Untouchables villain / SUN 10-30-11 / William Morris workers / Subject of Magritte painting / Classical Italian typeface / Cousin of ampule

Constructor: Andrea Carla Michaels and Patrick Blindauer

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: "Hollywood from Right to Left" — Movie titles have an "R" changed to an "L," creating wacky titles, clued "?"-style

Word of the Day: HEL (5D: Daughter of Loki) —

In Norse mythology, Hel is a being who presides over a realm of the same name, where she receives a portion of the dead. Hel is attested in the Poetic Edda, compiled in the 13th century from earlier traditional sources, and the Prose Edda, written in the 13th century by Snorri Sturluson. In addition, she is mentioned in poems recorded in Heimskringla and Egils saga that date from the 9th and 10th century respectively. An episode in the Latin work Gesta Danorum, written in the 12th century by Saxo Grammaticus, is generally considered to refer to Hel, and Hel may appear on various Migration Period bracteates. // In the Poetic Edda, Prose Edda, and Heimskringla, Hel is referred to as a daughter of Loki, and to "go to Hel" is to die. In the Prose Edda book Gylfaginning, Hel is described as having been appointed by the god Odin as ruler of a realm of the same name, located in Niflheim. In the same source, her appearance is described as half-black and half-flesh colored, and as further having a gloomy, down-cast appearance. The Prose Edda details that Hel rules over vast mansions, her servants in her underworld realm, and as playing a key role in the attempted resurrection of the god Baldr. (wikipedia)

• • •

Very cute, though the fact that there are Rs that don't got to L in the theme answers undermines the whole concept just a little. ANGEL MANAGEMENT is and FANTASTIC FOUL didn't work well for me because the movie involved in the former is not that famous and the movie involved in the latter is much, much better known as a comic. The funniest answer by a longshot was PILATES OF THE CARIBBEAN (though, unlike all the others, that one involves a massive pronunciation change in the affected word). Fill is lively an interesting throughout. Only things I really balked at were HEL (barely heard of her) and TINLIKE (which feels pretty rickety—about as solid as [any element]LIKE) (60A: Cheap and flimsy, as metal). Stunned to see "IL TROVATORE" again (the odds of an 11-letter word appearing in back-to-back puzzles must be pretty damned long) (17D: Opera whose second act is called "The Gypsy"). Really disliked the clue on TWO, mainly because the clue made no sense to me (86A: Number of X's in this puzzle's answer). There are multiple "answer"s in the puzzle. The puzzle does not have one "answer." My first instinct was to write in "OOO," thinking the clue was somehow playing around with the crossword convention of cluing a tic-tac-toe line; thus "OOO" would be zero. It made sense at the time. In my head. It did. I have no idea what ENDICOTT College is (32D: College in Beverly, Mass.), but ENDICOTT, NY is just down the street from me. It has a couple of claims to fame, most notably for being the "birthplace of IBM" (true fact), the birthplace of Johnny Hart (of "B.C." comic strip fame), and the childhood home of David Sedaris (who was born in Binghamton).

Theme answers:

• 23A: One of St. Peter's heavenly duties? (ANGEL MANAGEMENT)
• 42A: "Snakes on a Plane," e.g.? (SCALY MOVIE)
• 52A: What a lazy mover prefers to carry? (THE LIGHT STUFF) — good clue
• 67A: Workout class on a pleasure cruise? (PILATES OF THE CARIBBEAN)
• 88A: Unbelievable court infraction? (FANTASTIC FOUL)
• 96A: Cabby's nonstop patter? (TAXI DRIVEL)
• 119A: Guests at a Hatfield/McCoy marriage ceremony? (WEDDING CLASHERS)

The NE corner is like a crosswordese convention—Miss ELLIE rubbing elbows with LITA Ford, Frank NITTI (25A: "The Untouchables" villain) crossing paths with Joseph ALIOTO (16D: 1960s-'70s San Francisco mayor). IMEDLA Marcos and Sheena EASTON wanted to get in (45D: "Morning Train" singer, 1981), but as you can see, they were kept waiting just outside—not enough grid cred. Sorry ladies.




Bullets:

• 50A: Subject of a Magritte painting (PIPE) — no, "Ceci n'est PAS une pipe," so there's nothing to see here. Move along.
• 74A: William Morris workers (AGENTS) — not a good time to confuse William Morris and Philip Morris.
• 75A: Cousin of an ampule (VIAL) — I had FEUF for FIEF (71D: Feudal estate) and so had VEAL here at first. "What the hell kind of meat is ampule!?"
• 81A: Film special effects, briefly (CGI) — Me: "EFX?"

• 2D: Classical Italian typeface (ARNO) — I did not know this. ARNO is a river to me. A crosswordesey river.
• 12D: City that was the site of three battles in the Seven Years' War (QUÉBEC) — Damn. All those [This Many] Years' Wars had me thinking Europe.
• 47D: Ancient May birthstones (AGATES) — ??? AGATES are ancient? Or ... these used to be May birthstones in ancient times? I'm confused.
• 61D: Automaker since 1974 (KIA) — Sportage is on my list of potential cars (down the list, but on it). We are, as of now, a one-car family.
• 101D: Co-star of Kate and Farrah, in 1970s TV (JACLYN) — that's a nice, economical spelling. None of this Frenchified "QU" business. Just brass tacks.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

Michael of "Superbad" / THU 8-25-11 / Harold of the Clinton White House / Lepidopterist's tool / Patty Hearst alias / Tennis great born in Serbia

Constructor: Patrick Blindauer & Francis Heaney

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: Food Pyramids — Circled letters form the name of a food in the shape of a pyramid.



Hi hi, Andrea Carla Michaels here getting to blog today's SASSY (1D: Fresh) puzzle. The lovely PuzzleGirl will help me technically: editing, embedding the images and doing my laundry, because she's just that kind of friend! Speaking of friends, should I recuse myself because Patrick Blindauer and Francis Heaney and I are close buddies? Full disclosure: Patrick and I are frequent puzzle collaborators and I'm going to Patrick's wedding in a couple of weeks.* Well, I would pass on guest-blogging, if I didn't honestly love this puzzle and felt the least bit conflicted. Instead I've got lots to say about this little gem … and Rex was nice enough to let me sit in and say it!



First of all, let's look at the construction. You've got four food "pyramids" stacked across the grid: SOUR CREAM, COBB SALAD, SNOW CONES, SWEET ROLL. Clever, clever construction, if not the most nutritious four-course meal. Love me some Cobb Salad, tho you never know what you are going to get. Sometimes they forget the avocado and put peas in there, sometimes there is a hard boiled egg, sometimes blue cheese delicately sprinkled, sometimes just a huge chunk. It's always an adventure! Hmmm, now that I think about it, is a COBB SALAD a "food" per se or a type of meal made of up different foods? Same slight stutter in initially wanting SNOWpeas because I was unsure if snow cones were food. (By the way, do not, I repeat, do not look up "SNOWCONES" in the Urban Dictionary.)



One minor quibble, theme-wise. Being a start-at-1A solver, I'm not sure I wanted the theme circles to be given away in just the second entry of the grid .… I would rather have been enlightened at the end.



Loved that the grid was rife with food imagery! Patrick and Francis sweetened the solving experience with a little SUET here (4D: Ingredient in some English pudding … yuck), a little ROCA there (49D: Almond ___ (candy brand)), sprinkled with LESS SALT (24D: Dietary dictum for one with hyper tension … and with an echo of EKCO (30D: Kitchenware brand), all washed down with some wine (48D: Blush stoppers (CORKS)).



I would rate this fairly easy, because although I don't time myself, I see my only writeover was CaliSTOGA for CONESTOGA (38A: Pioneer carrier). That would be my Word of the Day, but you can look it up yourself. Just do not google SNOWCONES! I'm serious! I'll never sleep again!



Being a lady of a "certain age" (OLDIE?) I had an easier time with certain clues, e.g. SHE'S A LADY (33A: 1971 Tom Jones hit). How cool is that that Francis and/or Patrick spotted the word SALAD in there???!!







And I still vividly remember the SLA and TANIA (37A: Patty Hearst alias).



Some folks might have had trouble in the heavily-peopled far right middle section, what with EDIE (28D: Falco, of "Nurse Jackie"), the aforementioned TANIA and ICKES (40A: Harold of the Clinton White House). ICKES will live up/down to his name and be icky for some. Why on earth did Harold's parents not change their name when they had the chance? Younger folks are probably more likely to suss out KYLE (60A: "South Park" Boy), CERA (27D: Michael of "Superbad") and ELMO (15A: Friend of Zoe and Abby). I didn't know who Zoe and Abby were. "Sesame Street" premiered in 1969 … I was already ten and knew my alphabet fairly well at that point, so the Muppets were not part of my education. Though I have a vague recovered memory of two silhouettes mouthing, "MMM … OP … MOP"! Trickiest clue, I'm guessing, was "55D Mad people, e.g.: Abbr." If that tripped you up, the answer is EDS., which is short for editors, as in editors of MAD Magazine. Get it now? You're welcome! In my lifetime, we've gone from "What me worry?" to "No worries." Whenever someone says "No worries" instead of "You're welcome," I always feel compelled to respond, "Some worries!" (Then again, I'm Jewish.)



You could see the constructors' predilection for Broadway peek out with the RAITT clue referring to Bonnie's dad John, rather than the "Let's Give Them Something to Talk About" songstress. Bonnie lives here in San Francisco. We have mutual friends and I occasionally run into her, and we have this weird vibe where something always goes terribly wrong between us (once she sort of accused me of stressing out her blind poodle, but that's another story for another time!).



Speaking of San Francisco, I took TROLLEY CAR (54A: Conductor's place) as a personal shoutout to me. But then again, I take everything personally … even CLOBBER (my favorite word in the puzzle!)



Needless to say, these two brilliant creators rarely have DRECK (58A: Shoddy stuff) in their puzzles. The closest they come is DIPL. (42D: Embassy worker), which a little birdie told me may even have been changed. If WEEP were simply changed to PEEL, DIPL. would be transformed into DILL, two more food references (!). Plus you wouldn't lose their clever SEOUL entry (44D: City whose name sounds like a fish). That, by the way, is why Patrick and Francis are too clever by half … and I mean that in a good way … Their SEOUL is a triple Seoul Food/Sole Food/Soul Food pun! And, as we know, Seoul is the brevity of wit! (You would, however, lose the lovely Ms. Fay WRAY (51D "King Kong" costar, 1933).)



Finally, I would be betraying my Minnesota roots if I did not mention the very light Scandinavian theme (by light, I mean a total of two clues!). Scrabble players will recognize RYAS (29D: Scandinavian rugs) if they know their three-letter words (-YA also takes a P front hook!) … and PELLE (45D: "___ The Conqueror" (Max Von Sydow film)) is Norwegian, even tho Max Von Sydow (who was nominated for an Academy award for his role) is Swedish. That was a gimme for me as I have been in love with his son Clas going on 35 years now! Fun fact: Max Von Sydow (who's played everyone from Jesus Christ to the Exorcist to Ming the Merciless to the assassin in "Three Days of the Condor"; he was in all the early Bergman films and was the knight who played Chess with Death!) looks just like the picture on a $20 bill.







And on that (twenty-dollar) note, I'll say CIAO! (56A: Foreign farewell)



HUG (34D: O, Symbolically),

acme



* P.S. By the way, if you love Patrick's puzzles, be sure to check out his website. And you can hop on over to the Crossword Fiend Forum for a little puzzle I made for Patrick and his lovely-bride-to-be Rebecca in lieu of a proper engagement present!

Tom Mix vehicles /SAT 8-20-11/ 1822 Walter Scott novel / Hearts minds activities military slang / Carmen Sandiego cover-up We feel your pain sloganeer

Constructor: Byron Walden



Relative difficulty: I forget — Medium?



THEME: none





Word of the Day: HOGAN (1A: Indian home) —

n.

A one-room Navajo structure traditionally built with the entrance facing east, used as a dwelling or for ceremonial purposes. Early hogans were made of earth-covered poles, with later models often built of logs, stones, and other materials.

[Navajo hooghan.]

Read more: http://www.answers.com/topic/hogan#ixzz1VZ4WOzv3

• • •

This puzzle had two parts. First part: "Indian home? What the hell?" Second part: "N'SYNC ... ITALY ... hey, wait a minute, I've *done* this puzzle before." Turns out this is the puzzle that was used in the Finals of Lollapuzzoola 4, the crossword tournament I attended in Manhattan precisely two weeks ago. It's a really good themeless, but my favorite part of the puzzle was seeing the byline in the .pdf version, which I assume is the same byline as in the newspaper itself. "Edited by Brian Cimmet and Patrick Blindauer"! They were the tournament organizers. I cannot remember the puzzle being "edited" by anyone but Will Shortz. Ever. That's pretty cool. Patrick says that he thinks Will might have changed a small handful of clues, but that's it (normally, or at least in my case, he changes big handfuls of clues). I can tell you that the part that flummoxed the finalists most was the E and NE, with the most common problem being the understandable tendency to put in "YES WE CAN!" instead of "YES WE DID!" (14D: Celebratory chant at Chicago's Grant Park on 11/4/08). I know that's what I did when I was solving it. Worse, the "C" from CAN and the "L" from LAST gave me LILAC at 26A: Purple (LURID). That took some digging out. PART VI and PIÑERA (29D: Sebastián ___ (president of Chile beginning in 2010)) were hard to come up with as well. Otherwise, it's a nice, tough, thoughtful, interesting themeless. Hard all around, but very solvable.







HOGAN gave me trouble the first time I solved this, though I don't remember its clue. I also couldn't remember who Tom Mix was (bad crossword solver!), and so OATERS (2D: Tom Mix vehicles) didn't come very readily. Never heard of a QUADBIKE (32D: Certain ATV), but besides PIÑERA, that's the only unfamiliar term in the puzzle for me. No, wait, I've never heard of "THE PIRATE" (though I have heard of "THE" and "PIRATE") (16A: 1822 Walter Scott novel about Capt. Clement Cleveland). Movie questions threw me a bit. Had to piece EX-OUTLAW together pretty systematically (31D: Gary Cooper played one in "Man of the West"), and I completely forgot that PADME was Luke's mom (42D: Luke's mother in "Star Wars"). ART GUM is not a phrase I could've come up with on my own, but it was living in my brain somewhere—got it with a few crosses (39D: Kind of eraser). Love the clue and answer at 40D: "Hearts and minds" activities, in military slang (PSYOPS). What the heck is a GATEWAY CITY (46A: Miami or Amsterdam, for example). "Dude, don't try Miami, 'cause then you'll be hooked. Next thing you know, you'll be in Orlando, then Atlanta, and Charleston, and then eventually you're waking up in Nome going "What the @$#% happened?"" (that was my play on the phrase "gateway drug"—you can stop clapping now).







Bullets:

• 18A: President Harding's Laddie Boy and others (AIREDALES) — "Laddie" told me "dog," and then it was just a matter of a cross or two. One of the easier long answers in this puzzle.
  
  
• 19A: Elvis's and Mariah's record number of seeks at Billboard's #1 (SEVENTY-NINE) — Poor 79. Is this the only distinction you have?
  
  
• 24A: Until June 25, 2011, its first three digits had geographical significance: Abbr. (SSN) — Cool trivia. I wrote in SSR at first :(
  
  
• 25A: "Tempest" Golden Globe nominee Julia (RAUL) — he played Caliban in that. I know him better from "Kiss of the Spider Woman." He has one of those great crossword names where using his last name makes you sound like you're using someone else's first name.

• 37A: Weapon that comes in easy-to-carry and hard-to-carry varieties (MACE) — ??? I know that a mace is a heavy medieval war club, and that mace is something you spray in a mugger's face, but ... I don't know which is being referred to here. I hope not both, since they are completely different "weapons."
  
  
• 11D: Constellation between Scorpius and Triangulum Australe (ARA) — ARA should be your reflex answer for any "three-letter constellation" clue.
• 22A: Carmen Sandiego cover-up? (TRENCHCOAT) — another excellent clue. If you are not familiar with the children's geography-oriented show "Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?" then this clue/answer will be nonsense to you.
  
  
• 33D: Dickens character whose first name is Wilkins (MICAWBER) — As a Professor of English Literature, I of course learned the name of this character ... from crosswords. I've barely touched Dickens. The only novel of his I remember reading is Our Mutual Friend (gigantic! required! Thanks, Prof. Reed). I liked it, but shortly thereafter it was all medieval, all the time. Then it was crime fiction and comics. Maybe I'll get back to Dickens, some day.
  
  

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

Winter autobahn hazard / MON 3-21-11 / Joint woe afflicted Benjamin Franklin / Underground vegetable edible greens / Bottle-throwing occasion

Constructor: Patrick Blindauer & Steve Salitan

Relative difficulty: Medium


THEME: "Absolutely!" => the clue for six theme answers

• "YOU BETCHA!"
• "BY ALL MEANS!"
• "RIGHT ON, BROTHER!"
• "AIN'T IT THE TRUTH!"
• "DARN TOOTIN'!"
• "SURE THING!"

Word of the Day: John TESH (32D: John who once co-hosted "Entertainment Tonight") —

John Frank Tesh (born July 9, 1952) is an American pianist and composer of pop music, as well as a radio host and television presenter. His 10-year-old 'Intelligence for Your Life Radio Show' reaches 14.2M listeners/week, and is syndicated by Teshmedia on 400 stations in USA, Canada, and the UK. 'Intelligence for Your Health' (with Connie Sellecca) was launched in 2010. Tesh has won 6 music Emmys, has 4 gold albums, 2 Grammy nominations, and an Associated Press award for investigative journalism. Tesh has sold over 8 million records. His live concerts have raised more than $20 million for PBS. In 1995 Tesh sold 50% of his record company, GTS, to Polygram for $8 million. Tesh then created Garden City Records, which he still owns today. He is also known as the longtime host of the television program Entertainment Tonight. He has previously worked as a sportscaster for the Olympic Games, a news anchor and, a reporter. [his main genre of music: NEW AGE (50A: Enya's kind of music)] (wikipedia)

• • •

A fine Monday puzzle, with nice theme density. I wanted a "YER" at the beginning of "DARN TOOTIN'," but other than that, all the theme answers felt very natural. Non-theme fill is no great shakes, but given the structure of the grid (very high on 3- and 4-letter words), that's pretty much to be expected. If you want to accommodate that many theme answers *and* make the puzzle an easy early-weeker, then there's no real way around the preponderance of short stuff. Don't have much else to say about this one, which is probably just as well, as I am dead tired after two days in Brooklyn and a bus station / bus ride experience that I wouldn't wish on anyone—hours standing in Port Authority with hundreds of other people waiting for buses that never came, with no official information to be had except by a few people who ventured out and back ... all of whom got conflicting information (no buses upstate at all until tomorrow? all the buses are actually here, they just can't get inside because a half-marathon is obstructing their path? Etc.). Very nice but overworked man at Port Authority nearly got into several altercations trying to keep people from jumping the line. All in all, an adventure I'd just as soon not have had—unlike my American Crossword Puzzle Tournament adventure, which was fabulous. About which, more later (when I wake up and have more energy). The short version: I am the 31st Greatest Crossword Solver in the Universe. Also, I am the 2nd Greatest Crossword Solver in New York State (outside NYC), and I have the *hardware* to prove it. Here's a picture of me shaking Will's hand after hearing my name called by Roz Chast:


I had no expectation of winning anything, so I was laughing out loud as I walked up to get my trophy. Best part was walking up to Will, shaking his hand, and having him ask, "Now ... what did you win?" I then panicked and thought I had walked up there mistakenly (that trophy he's holding was Not for me), but it turns out Ms. Chast had just been reading names faster than the trophy wranglers could set them up, and so ... confusion. My trophy is a bit smaller than the one in the picture, but no less trophyish. Overall, the ACPT was super good fun. Got to see lots of top constructors and lots of blog readers and other really friendly people. Had dinner last night with half of today's constructing team, in fact (the Blindauer half). Ate too much. Drank too much. Played iPhone-APP "Celebrity" too much. But again ... more later, when my wits are more about me.

See final results from the tournament here.



Bullets:

• 1A: The Stones' "Sticky Fingers" and "Tattoo You," e.g. (LPS) — Neither this nor PROBE (2D: Exploratory spacecraft) (nor LOYAL, for that matter) came immediately. Had to pull out and back my way back into that corner.
  
• 27D: Joint woe that afflicted Benjamin Franklin (GOUT) — a little trivia for you on this Monday morning (Sunday evening for me). Clue could just as easily have stopped at [Joint woe], but no—you get a little edification with your GOUT.
  
• 37D: Underground vegetable with edible greens (BEET) — I could've sworn I had some this weekend, but I think I just *talked* about the fact that I had an "heirloom BEET salad" (delicious) the *last* time I was in Brooklyn for ACPT.
  
• 44D: They're worth twice as much as fins (TENNERS) — wanted TEN SPOTS. Wouldn't fit. TENNERS was my next guess—one of two Down answers in this puzzle that run through three different theme answers.
  

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

P.S. a huuuuuuge thank-you to treedweller for covering for me on Saturday and Sunday. I had stupidly forgotten to arrange for a substitute, so his last-minute offer to step in and cover for me was an invaluable gift. I love writing the blog, but at ACPT, I want to spend time with people, not my computer.

P.P.S. biggest Fail of ACPT awards ceremony was the non-announcement of D and E division winners.

D Champion was Jeff Stacey (overall finish: 115) (Caleb Madison was 2nd!)
E Champion was Joseph Longa (overall finish: 159) (Marion Strauss, who comments here as @mac, was 11th!).

Musical syllable singing system / THU 1-27-11 / Screen swinger Ron / Rice with three rings / Tickle Me Elmo manufacturer

Constructor: Patrick Blindauer

Relative difficulty: Medium

THEME: J to CH — Change "J" to "CH" in familiar two-word phrases where second word starts with "J-" — wackiness ensues


Word of the Day: SOLFA (24A: Musical syllable singing system) —

In music, solfège (French pronunciation: [sɔl.fɛʒ], also called solfeggio, sol-fa, solfa or tonic sol-fa) is a pedagogical solmization technique for the teaching of sight-singing in which each note of the score is sung to a special syllable, called a solfège syllable (or "sol-fa syllable"). The seven syllables commonly used for this practice in English-speaking countries are: do (or doh in tonic sol-fa), re, mi, fa, sol (so in tonic sol-fa), la, and ti/si, which may be heard in "Do-Re-Mi" from Rodgers and Hammerstein's score for The Sound of Music, as well as the Robert Maxwell song, "Solfeggio". In other languages, si is used (see below) for the seventh scale tone, while its earlier use in English continues in many areas. (wikipedia)

• • •

Mostly enjoyed myself with this one, though I got caught out at JACKO / SOLFA. No idea. Or, rather, *some* idea, because I eventually came up with "O," but only after being fairly certain it was "Y" — "JACK-" having led me to JACKY (O) far more readily than Michael "JACKO" Jackson (5D: Onetime tabloid nickname). SOLFA was a big ??? to me, though I must have seen it somewhere before, as it rings a very faint bell now that I look at it. I think the word "syllable" is in the clue precisely so that I *wouldn't* guess SYLFA, but all it did was reinforce SYLFA. Weird.

Theme is simple, but resulting theme answers (and clues) are funny, so I approve. With only four theme answers (I say "only" only because it's Mr. Blindauer, who can cram 'em in), I'm surprised there was as much lackluster short fill as there was; you know, your EEKs and OERs and MMMs and ENCYCs and YSERs and INITs and ESTOs and INTLs and ORTOs and ESSEs ... none of which is terrible on its own, but which in aggregate felt a little sub-Blindauer. A couple of right jabs for the pop culture haters today in LUPE and KATIE (I read all those damned books and don't remember KATIE, 52D: ___ Bell, witch who was a fellow student of Harry Potter at Hogwarts). I was luckier with LUPE (31A: Hip-hop's ___ Fiasco). I own an album of his and (no joke) I had this song in my head as I was solving the puzzle this morning, even before I hit the LUPE clue (Kanye West, featuring LUPE Fiasco):


Theme answers:

• 17A: Mean, illegal wrestling hold? (DIRTY CHOKE)
  
• 34A: Standard tobacco wad? (ORTHODOX CHEW) — I had "ORDINARY CHAW" at first ... ?
  
• 43A: Woo President Arthur? (COURT CHESTER)
  
• 63A: Fat fool? (BROAD CHUMP)
  

Weird to be done in by a pop culture clue (JACKO) when I benefited so much from knowing all this puzzle's pop culture (and sports) answers. Watched ALEX P. Keaton every Thursday growing up, Jerry RICE was the most accomplished wide receiver of my generation (if not of all time) (5A: Rice with three rings), never saw "Dune" but know most other films of David LYNCH pretty well ("Blue Velvet" and "Wild at Heart" were popular when I was in college), am currently making my way through the entire run of "Arrested Development" featuring Michael CERA as young George Michael Bluth (37D: Michael of "Superbad"), and Gordie HOWE was featured prominently in an episode of "The Simpsons" ("Bart the Lover") where Bart cruelly creates a fake secret admirer for his teacher Edna Krabappel and when asked for a picture sends in one of Gordie HOWE (28D: N.H.L. star nicknamed "Mr. Hockey").

Bullets:

• 15A: One of a literary trio (ATHOS) — of "The Three Musketeers"; I'm currently reading Dumas's "The Count of Monte Cristo" and *loving* it.
  
• 51A: Where Panasonic and Sanyo are headquartered (OSAKA) — i.e."Japanese city" ... not too hard to figure out.
  
• 60A: Noted earthquake locale (BAY AREA) — well that's true. Also, Jerry RICE played in the BAY AREA.
  
• 9D: River that begins in Nord (YSER) — Back-to-back YSER days. Who knows what we'll learn about the YSER tomorrow ...
  
• 13D: Screen swinger Ron (ELY) — anyone else want "JEREMY?" Anyone? No? OK.
  
• 61D: "Don't you forget about me" ("AHEM") — what an odd, interesting clue for "AHEM." The clue makes me (and every suburban kid my age) think of only one thing:

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

P.S. a message from today's constructor, Patrick Blindauer:

"I've also got a crossword contest going at my website, patrickblindauer.com/shop.html,
which has actually being extended until March 1. The winner of the big prize is still being drawn on Feb. 1, but I'm releasing a bonus puzzle at the same time and every correct meta-answer I get before March 1 will get a free copy of one of my puzzle books."

Turner's 1986 rock autobiography / MON 12-13-10 / Othello's rival Desdemona's affection / Grapefruit-like fruit / Former Egyptian leader lake

Constructor: Patrick Blindauer

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: TEAR (70A: Shed thing hidden in 16-, 25-, 39-, 49- and 59-Across) — letters string "TEAR" spans both words of two-word phrases in theme answers


Word of the Day: POMELO (66A: Grapefruit-like fruit) —

The pomelo (Citrus maxima or Citrus grandis) is a citrus fruit native to Southeast Asia. It is usually pale green to yellow when ripe, with sweet white (or, more rarely, pink or red) flesh and very thick pudgy rind. It is the largest citrus fruit, 15–25 cm in diameter, and usually weighing 1–2 kg. Other spellings for pomelo include pummelo, and pommelo, and other names include Chinese grapefruit, jabong, lusho fruit, pompelmous (from Tamil pampa limāsu (பம்பரமாசு) = pompous lemon and shaddock. (wikipedia)

• • •

Man oh man I *really* thought I was going to set a land-speed record today (breaking last week's Monday time of 2:30), but no. Nine seconds too slow. By the end, I was going so fast I was actually impressing myself, but it appears that the mysterious phrase WASTE AREA (??!) and the botched first attempt at "PLANET EARTH" ("LIFE ON EARTH" ... boo hoo) was enough to put me off my record pace. Of course one of the down sides of solving that fast is the unlikelihood that you will even notice the theme (which would've helped me with "PLANET EARTH," but just stopping to figure out the theme would've set me back more time than it would've saved me). One thing I learned today: you do not spell NASSER like VASSAR (and sadly that wrong "A" fell right in the (still) baffling WASTE AREA).



Best bits today = SCADS of SCUDS in the west, and the gorgeous DEFINITE ARTICLE right across the center (yes, I know it's only a special kind of nerd who finds DEFINITE ARTICLE gorgeous, but I am that nerd). Had a discussion with wife just this morning about xword playwrights and her difficulty telling them apart. Me: "There are three. 4 letters, 4 letters, and 5 letters. And yes, I get them confused too." The "5 letters" of which I spoke: ALBEE (11D: "The Zoo Story" playwright Edward). Turns out one of my "4 letters" isn't a playwright at all—James Agee wrote some very famous screenplays, and was a film critic and author of various books ... but not stage plays.

Theme answers:

• 16A: Profits (NET EARNINGS)
  
• 25A: Town dump, e.g. (WASTE AREA)
  
• 39A: The, grammatically (DEFINITE ARTICLE)
  
• 49A: Dodge City lawman (WYATT EARP)
  
• 59A: Emmy-winning nature series narrated by David Attenborough ("PLANET EARTH")
  

Bullets:

• 63D: Gay singing syllable (TRA) — here are some more gay singing syllables, courtesy of awesome Andy Bell and Erasure

• 6D: Turner's 1986 rock autobiography ("I, TINA") — she could not have predicted how popular this book's title would become, crosswordwise.

• 28A: Othello's supposed rival for Desdemona's affection (CASSIO) — yeah, that turns out to be a lie perpetrated by (guess! hint: he's crosswordtastic!)
  

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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